Celebs Who Could Use An April Shower

Since April is all about showers, here's our list of stars who look like they could use one. Robert Pattinson is rumored to stink, though he confirms he does in fact shower. Suggestion: Add deodorant, but nix showers. Dirty hot works for you, Robby.

Oh, the mysteries that lie within Amy Winehouse's famed beehive. Figuratively "cleaning up her act" may first require a literal cleaning. Suggestion: Britney-style head shaving is probably the only way to get water anywhere near her scalp.

Kelly Clarkson told Blender, "Anybody who says they don't [pee in the shower] is lying." With the controversy surrounding her quote, she may have axed showers entirely. Suggestion: Install a toilet next to her shower. It's the wave of the future.

Mischa Barton is going for the "grunge chic" look, but the stringy hair combined with greasy boyfriends and slouchy clothes just make it straight-up grungy. Suggestion: Shower with extremely low water pressure (high pressure may blow her away).

Anyone who spends as much time with their pooches as Mickey Rourke does is: A) a loving pet owner, and: B) probably stinky. Suggestion: Since it's hard to tear Mickey and his dogs apart, we suggest hosing them down together.

Pete Doherty has owned the greasy, dirty look for a while, but it's getting a little old … and moldy … and it's possibly a health hazard. Suggestion: Clorox bleach plus scouring brush.

Pete Wentz's "look" may be punk-rock to some, but to us it reeks of grease, guyliner, and urine-breath. Suggestion: A little bit of mouthwash goes a long way. For you, we'd say a whole bottle. Just douse yourself in it.

Evan Rachel Wood is 21 years old, but her caked-on makeup ages her at least 10 years. Suggestion: Wash your face thoroughly and wash away all your creepy, older goth guy suitors while you're at it.

Fergie's hairstylist may have been going for the sleek, sexy look, but it ended up being more of a flat, greasy look. Suggestion: Shampoo, rinse, and find a way to amp up that lifeless hair. Surely as a rock star, she has a wind tunnel on hand.

Remember the days when Joaquin Phoenix was a sexy, clean-shaven, talented, sane actor? Whether the breakdown is an act or not, his hygiene certainly tells no lies. Suggestion: Shave the beard, cut the hair, and knock it off already.